Our Friendship Does Not End Here
by Padawan Jess Kenobi
Summary: The events are during TPM time, a few days after Qui-Gon’s death. Padme stumbles across a grieving Obi-Wan, and comforts him, along with some help from an old friend. Angsty, drama fic about acceptance and love.


Title: Our Friendship Does Not End Here

Author: Padawan Jess Kenobi

Summary: the events are during TPM time, a few days after Qui-Gon's death. Padme stumbles across a grieving Obi-Wan, and comforts him. Angsty, drama fic

Disclaimer: I wish I was amazing enough to have invented the Star Wars world. Unfortunately I am not, and it is all Mr. Lucas' genius. But if he ever plans on giving up some of his characters, I'll take Obi-Wan and Han Solo very gladly…

**Authors note: Angsty! This was written sort of quickly, so it might not be 100% up to par, but I tried my best! Oh and the **_**italics**_** are like thoughts/people speaking in their minds.**

**I was listening to Braveheart music and it kind of made me cry while I wrote this! Haha so I'm going to be an evil author and hope that it brings out some emotion in you wonderful readers as well :) **

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For the first time since Naboo was freed from the invasion of the Trade Federation, Padme Amidala walked the corridors alone. She fairly had to sneak out of her room in the middle of the night, and had felt like a mischievous child slipping past the guards. She wanted to go to the gardens, which was the only place that she could find some peace and be alone for a while.

As she walked quietly through the deserted corridors, thoughts and images assailed her, one of them being the funeral that had taken place only a few nights ago. Though she had found Qui-Gon Jinn reckless and rash many of the times, he was a good man, and she mourned his loss. The funeral had been emotional, though as the Queen, she had had to remain detached. She had almost lost her composure when she heard Anakin sniffling and saw his eyes brimming with barely checked tears. But her heart had turned cold that night when she caught a glimpse of Obi-Wan Kenobi's face, which was as stoic and unmoving as if the figure in the funeral pyre had not been his Master, but a stranger.

She prided herself on never making a judgment about a person unless she knew the full truth, but she could not help but think the young Jedi heartless at that moment. She knew little of Jedi ways, but hadn't Qui-Gon Jinn been Obi-Wan's teacher for the past decade or so? She would have thought that that alone would have elicited at least a little emotion from the former padawan, who was now a Master.

For as long as she had known Obi-Wan, she had found him kind-hearted and strong, with a wry sense of humor. She had thought him stoic, but never heartless, until that night at the funeral.

She wasn't sure if she had just lost track of time, or whether her thoughts hastened her steps, but Padme suddenly found herself at the gardens. The grass underneath her slippers gave way gently, and her eyes were met with a sea of flowers of every color from white to sky blue, and from purple to a yellow that rivaled the sun. Fountains bubbled in the distance; the sound of running water soothing her weary soul already.

She began to walk automatically through the garden, weaving her way through the maze of flowers as though she had walked this path many times before. Indeed she had, and her feet took her silently through the garden and towards her favorite spot; a bench that overlooked a large white fountain.

The sound of running water was closer now, and she turned the last corner to where she knew her secret, favorite spot was.

"Oh, excuse me," Padme said, stepping back in surprise as she came across a figure suddenly in her path, sitting on the ground behind the very bench she was about to rest on.

The figure was sitting down with his knees pulled up to his chin, and his arms wrapped around his legs, much as a small child would sit. She could tell that he was holding something in his hands, though it was hidden by the large folds of his cloak, and so she could not discern what it was. His head rested on his knees, and his brown hood was up, obscuring his face.

The head snapped up suddenly as if he hadn't heard her approach until she had spoken, and the figure scrambled up to his feet suddenly. "Your Highness," the stranger said, his voice lightly accented, but husky.

Padme caught a sudden glimpse of the face under the hood as he lifted his head, and she cocked her own. "Master Kenobi," she greeted, her words distant by the memory of his unaffected face at the funeral. "I do not mean to impose on you," she continued politely.

"Not at all," Obi-Wan answered quickly, ducking his head suddenly. "I was just about to leave," he said as he hastily started to tuck the object he was holding into his pocket.

Padme was able to catch a glimpse of a lightsaber even before it fell from his hands onto the ground. It was at that point that she realized his hands were shaking.

She knelt down quickly to pick up the weapon at the same time that Obi-Wan did. She reached it first and froze when she recognized the lightsaber to have belonged to Qui-Gon before his death. Obi-Wan had stopped in his position as well, as though unsure of himself. His face was still cloaked, but she could tell that he was staring at the lightsaber that she held in her hand.

She looked up quickly and caught a glimpse of his eyes, usually so clear and blue, that were red and watery. His shoulders trembled suddenly as if of their own accord, and he moved as if to straighten himself. Without thinking, put down the lightsaber and reached out one hand to his shoulder to stay him, and with the other she gently pushed back his hood.

He did not fight her actions, but instead just stared numbly forward. Padme's heart broke at the look of grief-stricken pain on his face, and the redness of his eyes. She shifted so she was kneeling fully now, her gown splayed carelessly on the ground in waves of red and white. She gently helped Obi-Wan down as well so he was sitting in front of her, though his eyes were so glassy that she doubted he noticed the action.

She did not know what to say, and could not think of anything that would sound appropriate. Her eyes traveled over his face, across his features that were so handsome, even in his heartbroken state. His hair was unusually unkempt, and his cheeks looked hollow and shadowed by the beginnings of a faint beard. She still was unused to seeing him without his padawan braid, and the lack of it seemed wrong. She met his eyes again, and this time they focused on her, as if suddenly remembering that she was there.

Obi-Wan swallowed thickly, fighting the choking feeling moving up his throat. He willed his hands to stop shaking, and when they wouldn't, he tucked them inside his long sleeves. "I am sorry for intruding, Queen Amidala," he said stiffly, as though he could muster no more emotion to speak.

Padme barely regarded his words and leaned forward to face the young Jedi. Her long hair, usually tied up so elaborately, fell in loose waves around her shoulders, framing an angelic face that was filled with concern.

"You miss him," she said softly.

Obi-Wan raised his head bravely, and blinked a few times. "He was my Master," he responded shortly, though the simplicity of his words was belied by the torment in his eyes. Padme could not help but notice that those eyes were the blue-gray of a stormy sea.

"You don't have to be so strong in front of me, Obi-Wan," she said, her brown eyes gentle and kind.

Obi-Wan looked down for a moment, and then up into her eyes again. "I am a Jedi, and to be a Jedi is to know loss, and to embrace it. We all must feel death at one point or another, and we cannot let it rule us, or make us weak." Even as Obi-Wan spoke, his voice shook with emotion, though he tried his best to stay it.

"You have never been weak," Padme said with a shake of her head. "And your grief for Qui-Gon's loss does not make you so."

Obi-Wan bit his lip absentmindedly, and shook his head gently as well. "Qui-Gon was strong; if it were me instead of him that died, he would not act as weak as I do now," he said, a look of self-disgust flitting across his face.

Padme shook her head vehemently, and grabbed Obi-Wan's covered hands in emotion. "I don't believe that for a second," she said. "I did not know your Master well, and we disagreed often, but I could see that he cared for you deeply. Whenever he looked at you, it would be with such pride that I thought surely he must tell you every day. He loved you, Obi-Wan, and if it were you that had been killed, it would take a long time for him to be made whole again," Padme said passionately.

Obi-Wan looked away for a moment, and when his gaze met the Queen's again his eyes filled with water that he fought bravely to keep at bay. He let out a shaky breath and tried to force back the lump in his throat. His eyes asked the question that his lips could not form.

"Yes," Padme responded, without Obi-Wan even having to say a word. "He loved you, Obi-Wan, anyone could see it."

At that, Obi-Wan let out another ragged breath, and he blinked hard, tilting his head to the ceiling. His hands slipped out of his cloaked sleeves, and Padme allowed them to fall onto the soft grass underneath them. He was silent for a moment, and Padme could hear nothing except for his rapid breathing.

"I miss him so much," Obi-Wan said simply, though his words were filled with sadness that Padme could not even comprehend. When he looked back at her, the pain in his beautiful eyes broke her heart again.

"I know," Padme sighed, her own throat closing with emotion.

"I can't believe he's gone," Obi-Wan said, and the look in his eyes was that of a drowning man in a merciless sea.

Padme felt hot tears spring to her eyes, and found that she could not speak.

"He was always there for me," Obi-Wan continued, staring at her as if she were his lifeline. "And I wasn't strong enough to save him. He died while I watched helplessly, and I could do nothing. I would have given my life for him without a second thought."

"It wasn't your fault, Obi-Wan," Padme said soothingly, placing her hand on the Jedi's shoulder and rubbing it gently.

"I could do nothing," Obi-Wan repeated guiltily, the storm in his eyes like waves crashing down on a beach. "I've seen him die in front of me hundreds of times since his death. I just want the image to go away, to leave me alone. But it torments me, moment after moment, and I can't look away" he said brokenly.

"You cannot hold yourself responsible for what happened," Padme said again, more forcefully this time, almost physically shaking his shoulder.

"He was my Master, he was my friened; I had a pledge to him, a promise. I should have saved him," Obi-Wan said roughly. "It should have been me," he whispered, a single tear rolling down his cheek.

Padme reached up and gently wiped the tear from his cheek, watching as the water smudged across her finger. "He never would have wished that," she said gently. "He cared for you too much."

"I just wanted to save him," Obi-Wan said again, his chest rising and falling with deep, unsteady breaths.

The young Queen blinked the tears back, for she had to be strong for the Jedi. "But you did save him, Obi-Wan. He died knowing that the boy he had trained for all those years was a man, and a good, kind one. There is no greater gift than that," she said surely.

Obi-Wan closed his eyes, and more tears fell down his cheek, leaving a silver trail of water down his face. "He was like a father to me," he choked out, and then he could no longer hold back the tears, and they started to come as though a dam inside him suddenly broke.

Without thinking, Padme reached forward and drew the young Jedi to her, wrapping her arms tightly around him. Obi-Wan clutched to her arms as though holding on for his very life, and he trembled uncontrollably.

"Shhh," Padme whispered, running her hands through Obi-Wan's soft hair, comforting him like a mother would a distraught child.

"I miss him so much," Obi-Wan said against her shoulder, his tears already soaking through the thin material of Padme's dress and chilling her skin.

"I know," Padme soothed, continuing the motions through his hair.

"Why did he have to die?" Obi-Wan whispered brokenly, the pain in his voice biting.

"He died a hero," Padme responded softly into Obi-Wan's ear. "He died protecting those that he loved, and doing what he believed in."

"Father," Obi-Wan choked out before the sobs started, stronger than they were before, and they wracked his frame mercilessly. "Don't leave me here alone," he begged so quietly that the Queen barely heard him.

Padme held onto him tightly, rocking him back and forth like an infant. She whispered meaningless words into his ears for what could have been hours, as he cried silently into her arms. The soundless sobs were violent, and he trembled like a leaf would in a raging storm.

Obi-Wan's world was reduced to a haze and such an agony that it hurt him physically and he could barely breathe. He barely heard the voice at first, so quiet that he thought he imagined it. It came again, and Obi-Wan hardly could quiet his shaking sobs enough to hear it again.

"_You are never alone, Obi-Wan,"_ it said, the voice sounding as though it were so very far away.

Obi-Wan squeezed his eyes shut against Padme's shoulder, and tried to concentrate on the voice.

"_As long as you remember me, I will never leave you,"_ it said again, and a hazy image of Qui-Gon appeared suddenly in Obi-Wan's mind.

"_Master?" _ he said in his mind desperately, as he tried to block everything out to hear it.

"_Do not grieve for me,"_ Qui-Gon said, and this time his face was clearer in Obi-Wan's mind. _"For I have lived my life, and now it is time for me to go. But you, my padawan, you still have so many years to live, so many great things to do. And I know without a doubt that you could not have turned out to be a better man. I am so proud of you, Obi-Wan, and I want you to know this."_

"_I miss you so much, Master,"_ Obi-Wan said, his voice in his head sounding foreign even to himself.

"_I miss you as well, Obi-Wan, but I will never be far. I will be with you always, watching over you until that day when we will be reunited again in the Force. But that is a long time away, and you have a whole life to live, and so many peoples' lives to bless with your presence and your kind heart. _

"_You have made me the proudest man in the world," _Qui-Gon's voice continued, "_just to have the privilege to have called you my padawan."_

"_The honor was mine, Master," _Obi-Wan said, his voice breaking uncontrollably.

"_Dry your tears, my friend, for you must start your life again. As long as you have my love, you will never lose me. And death cannot stop love, my old apprentice; our friendship does not end here. I must go now, but remember what I have said."_

"_Don't leave me, Master, not again," _Obi-Wan begged, trying desperately to cling onto Qui-Gon's image and voice with his very being.

"_Look for me within yourself, and listen for my voice in the wind; for I am with you always," _Qui-Gon repeated, his voice growing more distant with the passing seconds. _ "I love you, my son."_

And Padme did not think that the Jedi's wracking tears could come any harder, but they did suddenly, and she held on to him tighter, her nails biting into his skin. Then the young Queen felt wetness come to her eyes, an emotion she could not suppress, and she started to cry as well.

She cried for the man she held, whose pure grief and love cut him worse than any physical wound ever could. She sobbed for all those people she had lost in the battle of Naboo, all her friends and trusted advisors. She shed tears for Anakin, the little boy she had come to care deeply about, and for herself.

Countless moments passed, and neither Obi-Wan nor Padme had any sense of time, until suddenly, Obi-Wan's shaking started to subside. Slowly, it got more controlled, until Padme loosened her fingers from their tight grip around his muscular arms and released him slowly.

The Jedi's face shone in the soft line, the light reflecting off of the tear-tracks down his cheeks. His drew a ragged breath, and willed his body to stop trembling .He swallowed, and lifted his head bravely to meet Padme's gaze. He smiled shakily, and upon seeing the turmoil in her wet eyes as well, he wiped the tears from her face.

"Are you alright?" she asked lamely, not sure of what else to say as she tried to compose herself.

"I know now that he is with me, though I many not hear him, or see him. I will heal," Obi-Wan said softly, and as he looked past her, he could have sworn that he saw Qui-Gon Jinn smiling back at him.

**Authors Note: This is the first Star Wars fanfiction I've written in like… 3 years or so, maybe even more! So comments would absolutely just make my day :)**


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